Where it all began

I am a first time mother, to a beautiful blue-eyed little girl called Brooklyn Ezmae. Until she was born, I did not think it was possible to worry about and miss another person as much as I do when we are not together.

I will be the first person to admit that I did not take to motherhood like a duck to water as many people say they do. Then again, my pregnancy wasn’t easy, with blood cloths, injections, tablets then Brooke, or princess B as I call her, decided she did not want to come out at full term, she went 10 days over, I was induced, waters broken twice and almost three days of painful labour (I was only allowed gas and air, then near the end I had nothing) and a ventouse later, a warm slimy baby was placed on my chest.

I went through all the emotions once she was born, I was hurt, resentful, annoyed and upset for weeks after she was born, I felt like everyone adored her but I was unable to find those feelings. I was tired and angry for weeks after she was born. We also spent the first week in hospital with her due to dehydrated.

But that soon all passed, I now find she is the most adorable easy loving and smiley baby that everyone else could see. Now she is almost 4 months and we have some fantastic times together.

My princess B and I are settling into a mini routine. We have morning breakfast, wash time, our day together, bath time at 6pm, bottle and bed. I will admit, it is a bit routinish and boring especially when I really want adventure and freedom, but I know these moments wont last forever so I treasure each and every one.